May 10
...serving up your daily dish.
Yesterday's Livingston bear has made its way to Newark, exciting local radio journalists and giving new meaning to the name of this baseball franchise. According to our highly-sophisticated bear tracking technology, the bear swept well south of Baristaville overnight. But, having evaded police authorities so far, who knows whether we could be the venue of the next bear sighting. Baristanet will give $100 to anybody the first person who sends us an undoctored picture of the bear strolling through our local streets, or being taken down by law officers.
Why are black bears walking the mean streets of Newark? Hmmmm, maybe you should read this for some clues about the displacement of wildlife in the Jersey exurbs.
"...Till the first kid gets eaten"??? Oh PLEASE STOP with the hysteria!! I think there are many other things much more dangerous to kids in Newark than a 250 pound bear.
And it's not funny at all. They will shoot the bear. I see this whole thing as tragic, not funny.
Posted by: Highlander | May 10, 2006 10:03:07 AM
This story gives new meaning to the
"TEDDY BEAR's PICNIC" SONG
If you go out in the woods today
You're sure of a big surprise.
If you go out in the woods today
You'd better go in disguise.
For every bear that ever there was
Will gather there for certain, because
Today's the day the teddy bears have their picnic.
Picnic time for teddy bears,
The little teddy bears are having a lovely time today.
Watch them, catch them unawares,
And see them picnic on their holiday.
See them gaily dance about.
They love to play and shout.
And never have any cares.
At six o'clock their mommies and daddies
Will take them home to bed
Because they're tired little teddy bears.
If you go out in the woods today,
You'd better not go alone.
It's lovely out in the woods today,
But safer to stay at home.
For every bear that ever there was
Will gather there for certain, because
Today's the day the teddy bears have their picnic
CHORUS
Every teddy bear, that's been good
Is sure of a treat today
There's lots of wonderful things to eat
And wonderful games to play
Beneath the trees, where nobody sees
They'll hide and seek as long as they please
Today's the day the teddy bears have their picnic
CHORUS
Posted by: Franklin | May 10, 2006 10:13:06 AM
Maybe this bear will find the pack of wild turkeys that have moved into my backyard/neighborhood. Yum-O.
Posted by: Jim | May 10, 2006 10:20:27 AM
"Baristanet will give $100 to anybody the first person who sends us an undoctored picture of the bear strolling through our local streets, or being taken down by law officers."
Not funny, Debbie. Not funny at all. All the bears want to do is be bears. They shouldn't have to be killed trying to do just that.
Posted by: Conan the Grammarian | May 10, 2006 10:21:11 AM
Conan,
Humor and tragedy can exist simultaneously.
Posted by: The Barista | May 10, 2006 10:26:03 AM
Maybe this is why they are running away from the woods and into the urban areas: photo
Posted by: Jim | May 10, 2006 10:27:07 AM
yeek... according to NJ.com, he was spotted about a mile from my house this morning at 3 am. Maybe he'll eat the bunnies that keep digging up my backyard.
Posted by: daniella | May 10, 2006 10:32:59 AM
I can't wait to see the prize winning picture of the slaughtered bear. Should be a laugh riot.
Posted by: Highlander | May 10, 2006 10:33:52 AM
Interesting photo: two big guys with big grins, 2 high-powered hunting rifles with scopes, one small-looking bear, probably a cub. Not the most heroic of occasions.
I'm sure, Debbie, that a photo of local cops with assault rifles and full SWAT gear "bagging" a bear would be even more tragic. Not at all funny, however. The bear is lost and confused, that's all. And until we open up the Pine Barrens and relocate a lot of them down there, we're going to have lots more such incidents.
Posted by: cathar | May 10, 2006 10:35:19 AM
Call me naive, but I interpreted the bear being "taken down" as the bear being tranquilized. Isn't that a lot safer than shooting live ammo in populated areas? And isn't that more humane? Wouldn't the authorities call in some bear expert from North Jersey and ship the sedated bear back from whence it apparently came?
Posted by: glee | May 10, 2006 10:40:12 AM
They will probably kill it because it has "learned" to get past its fear of people and inhabited areas.
It's regrettable but probably wise. You can't have large dangerous wild animals foraging in inhabited areas.
Posted by: Right of Center™ | May 10, 2006 10:47:39 AM
Good one, Iceman.
As for tranking the bear, yes in theory. In reality, we're talking cops, who start their days jumpy, who have a tendency to exaggerate such incidents.....I'd say it's 3-2 the bear gets taken down with a live round if he somehow gets out of Newark and back to "suburbia." But he sure must have done a great deal of traveling and he's under a great deal of stress. He could thus just climb a tree and wind up netted. Depends on the abilities and empathy of his pursuers.
Just for his traveling, I feel, the bear deserves our sympathy and admiration. Any suggestions for a name?
Posted by: cathar | May 10, 2006 10:49:24 AM
Putting it in the zoo is probably the best that could be hoped for.
Posted by: Right of Center™ | May 10, 2006 10:51:46 AM
ROC, I am in disagreement. The bear's "learned" nothing, his has been a journey of confusion and pursuit by hostile forces, that's all.
Relocation and rest, that's all the critter needs. Let us not whack him out.
Posted by: cathar | May 10, 2006 10:52:15 AM
the easy name would be 'Mazie' but i'm not going there.
Posted by: Iceman | May 10, 2006 10:54:04 AM
But, Ice, you have just gone there. And yes, it is almost too easy.
Posted by: cathar | May 10, 2006 10:55:32 AM
"And until we open up the Pine Barrens and relocate a lot of them down there, we're going to have lots more such incidents."
Perhaps, but the blueberry farmers and the beekeepers won't be very happy. The main group who want to re-intoduce bears to the Pine Barrens seems to be the hunters, who want more bears to shoot.
http://select.nytimes.com/search/restricted/article?res=FA0B16FF345C0C718DDDAE0894D9484D81
Note- if you subscribe to the Times you can get Times Select for free
Posted by: Bitpusher | May 10, 2006 10:55:44 AM
"And until we open up the Pine Barrens and relocate a lot of them down there, we're going to have lots more such incidents."
Perhaps, but the blueberry farmers and the beekeepers won't be very happy. The main group who want to re-intoduce bears to the Pine Barrens seems to be the hunters, who want more bears to shoot.
http://select.nytimes.com/search/restricted/article?res=FA0B16FF345C0C718DDDAE0894D9484D81
Note- if you subscribe to the Times you can get Times Select for free
Posted by: Bitpusher | May 10, 2006 10:57:23 AM
Haven't seen any bears, but in the past 5 years have seen:
-a wild turkey roaming my street on one occasion
-a pair of ducks, male and female, who visit my street once or twice every spring, usually on a rainy day
-a badger waddling in the backyard a few times
-one or two chubby raccoons
-grass snakes
-and 2 weeks ago out at one of the middle school fields, at about 6:45pm, we a deer emerge from the street side and dash across the field and into the woods
Who knew all this fauna existed in our densely populated and developed area?
Posted by: skipwith | May 10, 2006 10:57:28 AM
I don't have an opinion either way, I know nothing about bears.
However, I once lived in a place where this kind of thing was more common. Usually overpopulation or drought (lack of food) was the cause.
And I remember that in most cases the animal was killed because, simply, once they have done it once, they would do it again. So the "experts" said on the local news.
Having a hungry, or stressed large animal in our midst it too dangerous to chance happening again. Thats the logic anyway.
Posted by: Right of Center™ | May 10, 2006 10:57:57 AM
Maybe we could re-locate the bear to Eagle Rock Reservation to take care of the deer problem, or to Edgemont Park to take care of the goose problem, or to Brookdale park so we can watch ROC try to wack the bear with his pump while he is riding his bike.
Posted by: Bitpusher | May 10, 2006 11:02:20 AM
I hope that they don't eat blackberries. I'll have to keep her on a short leash.
Posted by: Bitpusher | May 10, 2006 11:04:20 AM
I wonder, bitpusher, how well organized and important a bloc blueberry farmers are. Ditto for beekeepers. We are hardly talking of two major economic forces here. I'm also whimsical enough to think our bruin friends deserve a pawful or two of blueberries every now and then, as if it's their God-given right.
In any case, opening up new habitat for bears does not have to match up with expanded hunting of them. Hunting in general is on the decline around here, deer controversies just seem to provide mild but brief spikes. I would in no way foresee Cumberland or Gloucester County thus becoming a jump-off point for bear "expeditions."
I've seen bears in NJ several times in my life. Never did they post a direct, immediate threat to anything other than the ladyfriend's garden and closed garbage cans. I really do think we can coexist (unlike, say, with al-Qaeda) with the critters. As long as we don't develop existing large "wilderness" tracts, that is. I'd really hate to see bears depart from NJ, it would remind me of the dolphins departing earth in "A Hitchhiker's Guide....."
Posted by: cathar | May 10, 2006 11:07:46 AM
